Monday, February 27, 2012

Jekyll & Hyde

"You are a mental case."

That would be me.

I have become that woman. The woman who, due to lack of sleep, tosses all sense out the window and become emotionally insane with a touch of aggression. My darling husband is the fortunate/unfortunate recipient of my multiple personalities. I would like to get rid of most of them and get back to one, but I think I need a straight eight hours sleep to make that happen. Perhaps one day, when the boy is twenty five and on his own...

I can say that my lack of working out at the gym also contributes to my hideous self. Sure the little one and I go walking pretty much every day thanks to this mild winter, but I am looking forward to getting back into strength training. It can only make me feel better and sleep better, even if that sleep is as a short as a Disney dwarf. The scary part is, though I am well aware of when the meltdown begins, it is like a hormonal freight train racing through. I cant stop it. Then I have to hang my head in shame and feel like crap and rightly so. I have no business getting snippy with the one person who does not deserve it. Maybe it is time for me to learn how to bake his favorites, black and white cookies, as token of my stupid mouth.

As for writing, I pretty much do it in my head when I lay down to go to sleep at night. Publishing is like my white whale at this point. I will get there, I swear. Or maybe I should not swear. Ahhh hell, let us all swear.

I need to embrace some of these mini mantras posted on Che' and Fidel. Not that I don't already. I got to shower this morning and let me tell you it was glorious. Helps that the little man has taken to napping pretty solid in his bassinet in the morning.

Sleep, glorious sleep :)


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